Passage Of Time Pt1: Falling
by fred21
Summary: Season 11: With Sam at Atlantis the others carry on, but when Teal'c also leaves Cameron, Daniel and Vala find things falling apart. Can SG1 survive?
1. Chapter 1

**Passage of Time**

**Part One: Falling**

For SG-1 the start of their eleventh year felt no less a milestone than their tenth year. The war with the Ori was over and they could now get back to what they had all signed up for. There were planets to explore, new discoveries to be made, a sense of optimism about what the future would bring...

**Chapter One**

**25th May 2007**

**SGC, Cheyenne Mountain**

Carefully sliding his arms into his sleeves of his dark blue shirt Colonel Cameron Mitchell eased it on, giving a winch as he did so as the muscles and nerves around his cracked ribs ached in protest.

After spending the past two weeks in the infirmary he was relieved to be leaving, glad to be given the all clear by Carolyn even if he wasn't allowed to return to active duty for at least another week. In the meantime he had a week's leave during which he had been ordered to take it easy. Carolyn had been firm in her instructions and Cameron knew better than to argue with her. Though he would never admit it, she was pretty scary at times especially when she was in doctor mode. He was just happy to be allowed out even if it meant that for the next week he couldn't do much accept sleep, eat, watch TV and catch up on mission reports. Thinking about it now it actually didn't sound that bad. Even more appealing was the fact that Amy was coming to stay, something that was definitely worth being out of the infirmary for.

Meeting up with Amy at their high school reunion had stirred some of the old feelings that he once had for her; that she was interested in him also had been a pleasant surprise. Unfortunately with the fate of the galaxy once again hanging in the balance there had been little opportunity to see each other again since then. They had had just two dates in the six weeks since the reunion. Their first date had been a little awkward at first with both of them feeling slightly nervous but this had faded as the evening progressed and they had relaxed over dinner finding common ground talking about family and old friends from high school.

It was only with Cameron being stuck in the infirmary these past weeks that they had gotten to know to each other a little better. With not much to do he had sent Amy an e-mail which had quickly turned into a regular correspondence, sending three or four emails, sometimes more, back and forth each day. Through them he had learned that she was a member of a quilting club, loved horse back riding, enjoyed gardening, was a fan of the Dixie Chicks and was afraid of spiders, even daddy long legs. Though he couldn't talk to her about his work he did tell her some funny stories about his team mates, sticking to the cover story that had been made. Hence Vala was from Romania, Teal'c was a martial arts instructor from Tanzania, Daniel worked as a translator and Sam was an astrophysicist. As far as Amy and anyone else were concerned they worked at Cheyenne Mountain and were good friends.

It all sounded a bit far fetch to Cameron but then again the reality was even more far fetched. After all who would believe that the five of them traveled to other planets, that they had met, made friends and fought against aliens and that Teal'c and Vala themselves were aliens. Yep, the cover might look a bit bogus but it was at least a bit more believable than the truth.

"So, ready to go?"

Hearing a familiar voice Cameron looked up just as he finished doing up the last few buttons on his shirt to see Daniel coming into the infirmary, pushing a wheelchair.

"Just about, though I think I can manage just fine without the chair." Cameron flicked his head at the wheelchair as he picked up his leather jacket off the infirmary bed.

Daniel shook his head. "Sorry, Doctor's orders."

"Jackson I don't think..."

"You wouldn't be trying to disobey orders, would you Colonel?" said Carolyn, walking into the room, her tone carrying an undercurrent of firmness, "Because if you are, I might just reconsider letting you go."

Taking in Carolyn's steely gaze that showed she would do just that if she thought it was for the best, Cameron knew there was little point in arguing with the doctor. Giving a sigh he went over to the chair, noticing the smug 'I-told-you-so' smile that Daniel now wore. "Fine, I'll use the chair."

"Good." Carolyn exchanged an amused smile with Daniel as Cameron reluctantly sat down in the chair. Her gaze remaining on them as they headed towards the doorway. "By the way, Happy Birthday."

"Oh, uh, thanks," Cameron replied in surprise, "You know I'd almost forgotten all about it. At least I don't have to spend it stuck in here, though I'm guessing' dancing on table tops is out of the question."

"I wouldn't advise it," Carolyn said, calling out after him as Daniel wheeled him away.

***S***S***

"Is she still watching?" asked Cameron, dropping his voice low once they had travelled several feet down the corridor.

Daniel turned his head around, looking behind them. "Yep." Turning back he carried on pushing the chair in the direction of the elevator. "I think maybe you better just let me wheel you out of here. I wouldn't want to get on her wrong side."

Cameron gave a chuckle. "Yeah, you and me both. Even Teal'c's a little nervous of her."

"Well, she does have some pretty scary looking needles in her arsenal. I wouldn't want to be on the receiving end of any of them anytime soon. Somehow I don't think you want to be either."

"Ain't that the truth," acknowledged Cameron, who had been on the receiving end of more needles than he cared to admit.

"Anyway look on the bright side; at least she's letting you go even if it is with an escort and we can celebrate your birthday. There might not be any dancing on tables, which I'm thinking is a good thing, but I'm sure we can still have some fun," said Daniel as they entered the elevator.

"Why do I have the sudden feeling that you're up to something? And why am I starting to get worried?" Cameron looked up at Daniel with suspicion, noting the smile on Daniel's face as the elevator doors closed.

***S***S***

**Ten days later**

**SGC, Cheyenne Mountain**

Walking out of the men's locker room dressed and geared up for his first mission back since defeating the Ori, Cameron met up with the rest of his team mates in the corridor.

"Now this is how it should be. The five of us. SG-1. The band. Going on missions. Making new discoveries. Having adventures," he happily said a huge grin on his face.

"Glad to be back, uh?" teased Sam, giving him a cheeky smile in return.

"You betcha. It was nice seeing Amy for a couple of days but other than that there is only so much SpongeBob you can watch before you start going around the bend."

"Did you not enjoy watching the Star Wars collection I gave you, Colonel Mitchell?" asked Teal'c as the five of them walked along, heading towards the gate room.

"No it was all good. I watched them all in one day that still left ..." Cameron held out his hand counting off the days.

"You watched all three Star Wars movies in one day?" Daniel looked between Teal'c and Cameron with faint surprise.

"No. I watched all six."

"It was The Ultimate Collection," explained Teal'c calmly at the look of amazement that spread out across Daniel's face.

Cameron and Sam exchanged smiles as the two of them walked ahead of the others.

"Don't tell me you're not glad to be back. Though I understand you had some excitement while working at the midway station." Cameron looked at Sam, knowing she was glad to be back with the team, just like he was.

"I had some help."

"Don't be so modest Samantha, without you Atlantis would still be missing and in all likelihood Colonel Sheppard and his team would have been killed... or worse," said Vala, as she followed behind them with Daniel and Teal'c walking alongside her.

Daniel peered over the rim of his glasses with a questioning. "There's worse...?"

"Of course there is. I think if I had a choice, death would be preferable than spending two weeks with Doctor Lee for company."

Sam held back a smile. "It wasn't that bad. Anyway I understand you had some excitement of your own. I heard the birthday went well. I'm sorry I missed it."

"Yep, you missed a great party Sam. Teal'c's rendition of I Will Survive was pretty memorable and Walter got everyone up and singing We Are the Champions. It was a lot of fun," said Cameron, as they turned a corner, pausing for a moment before he continued, speaking out a aloud the thought that had been lingering in his mind for the past few days as the reality of their situation had sunken in, "It's kind of weird not having a big bad guy to fight anymore."

Sam gave a nod in agreement as she remembered. "Yeah. That's how we felt when we defeated the Goa'uld... and the replicators... the first time."

"Well, Jackson and Vala took care of that."

Vala spoke up, indignation in her voice, "That whole Ori thing was not our fault!"

"Just take the blame. You get used to it," Daniel said patiently.

"We played a big part in fixing the problem."

"That you did," agreed Mitchell.

Changing the subject Teal'c spoke in his usual quiet manner sticking to the most obvious fact as they entered the gate room. "There are still many planets in our gate system that remain unexplored."

Standing at the bottom of the ramp the five of them looked ahead at the Stargate, all of them excited about what might await them out there in the unknown.

"Yes, let's see what mysteries P3K-546 will hold," announced Daniel.

"And what treasure," added Vala, hopefully.

With a smile on his face, glad to be back with his friends Cameron kept his gaze on the gate. "I'm sure something will come up. Walter, hit it!"

***S***S***

"Okay Sam, we're all here, so what's up? It's obviously something important."

Perched on the end of an armrest of one of Sam's living room chairs Cameron glanced around at the others know they were just as curious as he was.

They had all been wondering what was going on ever since they had completed their mission to P3K-546 the day before and had returned to find General Landry waiting to inform Sam that she was needed urgently in Washington. The request itself, though surprising, wasn't all that unusual; they had all been called away in the past for urgent meetings without little or no notice. No what was different about this was the secrecy behind it. General Landry had revealed nothing about what the meeting was about and Sam had been just as much in the dark as the rest of them were.

It was only now more than 24 hours later that they were finally going to find out why she had gone away so urgently. Privately between them they had tried to surmise what it was about, the most logical conclusion being that Sam had been called in by the IOA to discuss the events that had happened at the midway station and Sam's part in going to the rescue of Atlantis. They hoped that the IOA hadn't tried to make out that she had done something wrong, because if they had all of SG-1 were ready to defend Sam's actions; they knew she had done the right thing.

Standing up, Sam breathed deeply, collecting her thoughts.

The news. Her news. Was pretty amazing. Even 24 hours later. Her emotions were all over the place, varying from shock to excitement to doubt and uncertainty and back again. Yet despite her inner turmoil she knew in her heart that it was the right decision. It was a great opportunity, one which she would be foolish to turn down.

The reality was she had few ties to her home or even to Earth anymore.

Her family, at least her biological family, was gone. Mom and Dad were dead and her and her brother Mark had never been all that close. She had tried to be a good Auntie to his kids, sending cards and gifts, talking to them on the phone and for awhile, at least things, had been better between them. But since their father's death and her break up with Pete her and Mark had drifted even further apart than before. She had tried not to let it get to her but it had hurt. Far more than she had admitted. Mark blamed her for everything and now their only contact was through the occasional Christmas card.

And then there was Cassie, who was the nearest thing to a daughter that she would probably ever had. She was 22 years old now and making her own decisions. She no longer needed Sam like she once had, even less since she had graduated from the Air Force Academy. With her promotion to Second Lieutenant and her recent placement at the Icarcus Base, Sam knew that though there would always be a bond between them there would been few chances for them to see each other.

As for Jack...

Well, it was time to put that behind her. Neither her or Jack were ever going to do anything about the feelings they had. She had tried. Okay maybe not hard enough, she'll admit that, but she had at least tried to talk to him about this... whatever it was between them, but something always got in the way. And here they were, 10 years later of being good friends but nothing more and she was finally at the stage where she was beginning to feel okay about it. To accept what they had for what it was. A friendship and nothing more.

She had gone through the really difficult phase two years ago. Finding out he was seeing someone else, the death of her father, the break-up with Pete and Jack's relocation to Washington, all of that had been hard. It was why she had left, at least for awhile; she needed to get things into perspective. She told everyone that Cassie was going through a difficult time but the truth was it had been her that had been having the hard time.

That was all behind now and her life was good.

Still leaving would be hard.

SG-1 was her family and she loved each and every one of them. To leave them behind would be hard, incredibly hard. With another deep breath she pushed back her doubts. They needed to know and she needed to tell them.

"I've been offered..., I mean I've accepted... that is..."

"Sam," said Daniel cutting in, his tone sharper than he had intended. Realizing this he lowered his voice back to its normal pitch, giving her an encouraging smile. "What is it that you're trying to tell us?"

Sam blurted it out, a huge grin appearing on her face. "I've been made the new commander of Atlantis."

For a second or so there was complete silence as all four faces looked at her, a variety of expressions flashing across their faces as the news sunk in.

"Okay, now THAT I wasn't expecting."

Cameron's voice was the first to break the silence, followed in quick succession by the others.

"Sam that's wonderful!" Vala went up to Sam, throwing her arms around her as she hugged her tightly..

"Wow." Daniel looked at Sam in complete surprise. "That's… that's great."

"It is indeed a great honor, Colonel Carter, though you will be sorely missed," stated Teal'c, unknowingly voicing what they all felt.

Sam, her face flushing in embarrassment looked at her team in gratitude. "Thanks guys. I still can't quite believe it myself."

Cameron went up to her giving her a hug also, a smile on his face. "You know I worked my butt off to get the band back together and here you are leaving. I'm sure we could rustle up some bad guys to fight if that's what you're missing..."

"Cam..."

"It's okay Sam, really," said Cameron quietly; stopping her from saying all the things she didn't need to say, "I'm happy for you, you'll do a great job. Their lucky to have you." He looked down at her tenderly. In the past two years she had become like a sister to him, he was going to miss having her around. "They better treat you right. If they don't, you tell them they'll have me, Daniel, and Teal'c... and Vala," he added as Vala prodded him in the back with one of her fingers, "to contend with."

Laughing even as the tears began to well up in her eyes Sam gave him a tender look of her own, before she looked over to the two men who she had shared so much with over the years. They were her dearest, closest friends, what they had in fact went beyond friendship, it was something she couldn't put into words she only knew that she would miss them greatly.

She turned her gaze to Teal'c first, his expression stoic as ever and yet behind it she thought for a moment she caught a glimmer of what looked liked sadness before it was gone, leaving behind only a gaze filled with pride as he gave her a small bow with his head and shoulders, a gentle smile on his face.

Sam returned his smile then turned to Daniel. Slowly the two of them moved forward to each other at the same time. Finally face to face Sam found herself enveloped in another hug.

"I'm going to miss you." Daniel's voice was filled with emotion as he held on tight to her.

"Me too." Sam's own voice was stuffed full with tears, muffled slightly by Daniel's shoulder as she spoke into it.

"Hey, cut that out. You'll have me crying next, not to mention Vala," said Cameron, "This is a celebration. I say we go out and do just that. Dinner's on me."

Sam pulled herself away as Daniel's grip loosened though his arm stayed around her waist as she leaned into him her, hand resting lightly against his chest. Looking over at Cameron with a happy smile she tried her best not to laugh or cry though she wanted to do both.

"That's a great idea," she replied, as Daniel handed her a clean handkerchief from his pants pocket.

Dabbing at her eyes they all made a move to leave, grabbing jackets as their voices mingled together as they discussed where to go for dinner.

Vala spoke first, quickly followed by Daniel, then Cameron, Vala again, then Teal'c, as they walked out the front door heading to Teal'c SUV for the drive into town.

"So where should we go?"

"How about Italian?"

"I was thinking of a big juicy steak, mashed potatoes, plenty of salad."

"You always suggest that."

"May I suggest Burger City. Their sign says they have the best burgers in the city. I am curious to try one."

As the last to leave, Sam shut the front door, a smile on her face as she listened to the familiar voices of her friends.

***S***S***


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

**Four weeks later **

** SGC, Cheyenne Mountain**

"First Sam, now you. It's just not right."

At the indignant tone in Vala's voice, Teal'c looked up from his packing. Since her arrival she had been moving restlessly about his quarters, picking up random objects to stare at them for a moment before placing them back down. It was obvious from her actions that her mind was on something else other than the ornaments she seemed determined to look at,

"I have gone away before, Vala Mal Doran. This is no different."

Teal'c knew that his leaving was having an impact on the others. For the first couple of weeks after Samantha Carter had left, they had all felt a sense of disorientation, as if they had lost an important part of themselves. And now just when they were adjusting to once again being a team of four, he was leaving them. Colonel Mitchell had tried to hide his disappointment, while Daniel Jackson had said very little. Vala Mal Doran on the other hand was being most vocal in her disapproval.

"I know that. But have you even considered what it's going to be like for me while you're gone? Daniel's been hiding out in his office studying some new artifact which apparently I _couldn't_ possibly understand," she said, making air quotes with her fingers, "And Mitchell's tied up training some new recruits. You know I never thought I would miss the Ori but I'm beginning to wonder if we weren't just a little hasty."

Vala paused as she put down the ornament she had been holding and turned to look at Teal'c

"I've got a great idea. How about I come with you?" Vala smiled encouragingly at him, her eyes sparkling with excitement, "What do you say Muscles? You and me? There's not much going on here, I'm sure Mitchell and Daniel won't mind if I go away for a few days."

"Your offer to accompany me is welcomed but I will be gone for many weeks, if not longer."

Teal'c had no wish to hurt Vala Mal Doran's feelings. He had come to appreciate her as a friend. Her warmth and good humor were just two of the qualities that he admired about her but he had his reasons for going alone.

For ten years he had lived here amongst the Tauri and along the way this strange planet had become his home. People, who had at first been strangers and then colleagues, were now his friends, his family. And yet he had another home, another family, and it was for this reason that he was leaving.

All these years he had divided his time between this world and those of the Jaffa. In the beginning he had done it because it had been the right thing to do, a way to help free his people. Now though his people were free and yet here he was living back amongst the Tauri. He needed to decide once and for all where he belonged. Only by leaving could he know where his place truly was.

"Oh..." Her smile faded, her disappointment that she couldn't go with him obvious. "But you are coming back? Aren't you?"

Teal'c hesitated as he closed his bag, considering how best to reply to her query. In truth he was not sure if he would be coming back but he had not told the others any of this. He preferred honesty and was not comfortable keeping secrets from his friends but until he had made his decision it was best that they were kept in ignorance, some things were better of left unsaid.

"We will see each other again, Vala Mal Doran. Of that I am certain."

Vala flashed him a tentative smile then turned around, her back facing him as she pretended to focus her attention on a wall hanging yet all the while her mind kept telling her that Teal'c hadn't answered her question, her smile wavering as she realized this.

***S****S***

**Six Weeks Later **

Taking a sip of his coffee General Hank Landry stared out through the observation window in his office, his gaze focusing on the three remaining members of SG-1 who were in the briefing room along with SG-3.

The effect of losing two of their team members was noticeable. There was a distance between the three, a palatable tension that they carried around with them, both as a team and separately.

He was not the only one to notice, others at SGC had also expressed their concerns. The lost of Sam and Teal'c had hit them hard but he had thought they would have been over it by now but instead things seemed to be getting worse, if that was at all possible.

Doctor Jackson and Miss Mal Doran seemed to irritate each other more whenever they were together, their irritability turning into a tide of constant bickering. Colonel Mitchell was trying his best to keep up morale and to act as a buffer between the two but even he was looking weary, his good humor far less in evident.

Away from the missions they spent little time together anymore. Doctor Jackson rarely left his office, Colonel Mitchell, it seemed, couldn't get away from the base fast enough, Miss Mal Doran on the other hand was beginning to make a nuisance of herself, pestering a number of staff, offending others with some of her less than subtle comments.

He was a patient man and was confident that things would sort themselves out in time but he could not help but be concerned by the current state of affairs.

***S****S***

With his head curved forwards towards the floor, Cameron shut his eyes and let his mind drift as the hot water from the shower pounded down on his head, the rhythmic sound of the water roaring in his ears as it flowed down his body.

He felt as if everything he had worked towards was slipping through his hands. First Sam had left, then Teal'c and there was obviously something going on with Daniel and Vala but whatever it was neither of them were letting him in and for the first time in two years he felt completely and utterly alone. He was an outsider again, only this time it was much worse, this time it felt like it was his family that was abandoning him and it hurt like hell.

He tried not to think about it, hoping that the three of them would find that comfortable groove, get back into the rhythm that they had found when they had first met two years ago. So far he was doing his best to try to carry on as normal but if he was being completely honest with himself it was getting harder and harder to pretend that everything was alright.

Even running, the one thing he took refuge in when things got too much, wasn't helping as much as it use to.

It felt as if he had jogged endless miles in the past several weeks, pushing himself into a state of exhaustion, focusing his mind on each stride, the pounding of his feet on the ground, He had worked so hard to get the band back together. The last two years had been everything he had hoped it would be and more. SG-1 had carried on with him as the leader and had added another new member in the form of Vala.

And now it looked as if what was left of SG-1 was falling apart and there wasn't a damn thing he could do about it.

Something had to change.

***S****S***


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

**SGC, Cheyenne Mountain  
**

"Just get out!"

Daniel's voice rang out loud and clear in anger and frustration, the sound of it traveling down the corridor that ran outside his office. Vala's voice quickly followed, just as loud and frustrated.

"I have just as much right to be here as you!"

"This is mine office!"

"I'm so sick of you throwing that in my face. _'This is mine office'_. What makes you so important that you have an office to yourself? Just because you think you're smarter than everyone else."

"Compared to you I am!"

Cameron stood at end of the corridor, arms folded, leaning against the wall as he listened to the fighting between Daniel and Vala. Things were not going well.

They had been at it, for want of a better word, for at least the past 15 minutes, their voices getting louder and louder, echoing down the hallways. Everyone on the base had been alerted and were doing their best to keep away. Cameron had appointed himself as point man just in case someone was foolish enough to risk going down there.

"At least I can see what's going on right in front of me!"

"Only because you stick you nose in everything!

"I take an interest. Show people I care. You, you... shut yourself away in here, hiding from everyone. It wouldn't hurt you to be more sociable. You might even make some friends!"

"Like you, you mean. The woman who has to flirt and make sexual come-ons to every man she meets..."

"At least I like sex!

"THAT is blatantly obvious"

There was a brief pause, a moment of silence which was then followed by the distinctive sound of something hard and heavy hitting a wall, smashing as it did so.

"I hate you!"

"Well, the feeling's mutual!"

"You arrogant! Stuck up! Obnoxious! ..."

Cameron couldn't follow the rest of Vala's reply since it was Goa'uld but he was left in no doubt from the continued yelling that whatever she had said wasn't all that nice.

"Still at it I hear."

Hearing General Landry's voice Cameron gave a glance to his right seeing the calm and steady figure of his commanding officer.

"Yep, though now their yelling in Goa'uld. At least that makes a change."

"You know this can't continue. Their bickering is getting on everyone's nerves, mine included. I know that things haven't been the same since Colonel Carter and Teal'c left, but this has gone on long enough."

Cameron knew that the General was serious and frankly he had to admit he was getting pretty sick and tired of all the fighting himself, it was time for him to take some action.

"I know Sir, I'll deal with it."

***S****S***

**Two Days Later**

"I don't see why Daniel has to come too."

Voicing her unhappiness at the whole idea of going away for a few days with the person she least wanted to spend time with, Vala walked, somewhat reluctantly through the parking lot of the SGC, following Cameron to his car as she carried a small overnight bag in one hand.

Cameron walked a few steps ahead, his stride not faltering as he made his way. In his right hand was Vala's much other larger bag which was stretching at the seams, looking as if it would burst open any minute from the amount of stuff she had obviously cramped inside.

"He's coming because I asked him. Just like I asked you."

"Well you didn't exactly ask... more like an order," Vala muttered not all that quietly, her voice getting louder as they approached the car, "You know I am a civilian, in fact I'm not even from Earth. I don't have to do what you tell me..."

Approaching the car Vala stopped as Cameron turned to her, his face like granite, hard and unyielding as he dropped her bag onto the tarmac.

"Vala, just get in the car. You're coming and THAT'S an order, and if you don't like it, tough."

Cameron took the other bag from Vala's hand and opened the passenger door, his hand gripping the edge of it tightly, staring at her, letting her know that she was going one way or another, even if he had to drag her kicking and screaming.

Though part of her was tempted to say something, Vala bit back her retort and got into the car, leaving Cameron to slam the door after her.

***S****S***

"Vala, go and sit in the back."

Cameron watched at Daniel walked down the path at the entrance of his apartment building, a bag in his hand.

"Why do I ..."

Vala stopped in mid sentence when she saw the look Cameron shot at her and clambered over the seat, landing in the back.

At the look that Daniel gave when he saw that Vala was in the back seat, Cameron sighed, holding back his response while Daniel put is bag in the trunk and got in, sitting himself in the passenger seat.

"Right." Cameron turned, facing Daniel and Vala. "This is how it's going to be. We're going to drive to the airport, catch our plane, pick up the rental car and then drive to my folks. There will be NO fighting, NO bickering, NO snide comments. You will be on your best behavior the ENTIRE time that we are away. DO I make myself clear."

Vala opened her mouth to say something, but seeing the almost imperceptible shake of Daniel's head, she changed her mind and instead flashed Cameron a big grin.

"Perfectly," she said at the same time as Daniel nodded yes to Cameron.

***S****S***

Seeing the car pull up and their son get out, Frank and Wendy Mitchell could see the evidence of the strain that Cameron was under. They knew their son well, and though Cameron was good at putting on a brave face, they could see the signs. Both thinking the same thing they glanced at each other in silent communication and moved forward to greet their son and his friends.

Wendy enveloped her son in a hug. "Cameron."

"Mom, Dad." Cameron returned the hug, greeting them both.

"Vala lovely to see you again. I've made some pie especially for you." Wendy smiled when she saw the grin that Vala gave at the mention of pie then turned to the man standing nearby. "And you must be Daniel?"

"Hello Mrs. Mitchell, Mr. Mitchell. It's nice of you to have us," said Daniel shaking both their hands.

"Please call us Wendy and Frank and you're more than welcome. It's always lovely to have some of Cam's friends visit. Why don't we get you all inside and settled and then we'll see about that pie."

As the others followed Wendy into the house, Cameron and his Dad trailed behind them, walking more slowly.

"That bad, is it son?"

Cameron glanced at his Dad, unsure of what to say,

"Come on, let's go and get some of your mother's pie." Frank gave his son a gentle squeeze on the shoulder, letting him know it was going to be okay.

***S****S***

"So dear, how are things going with you?" asked Wendy as she washed the dinner dishes, placing a soapy plate in the dish stand for Vala to dry. Through the large kitchen window she could see the three men standing underneath the clear night sky, talking and enjoying a bottle of cold beer.

"Pretty good."

"Seeing anyone special?"

"Well no... not really. It's been hectic lately... at work. You know what its like."

"Yes. I imagine that it can get pretty demanding working in... accounts receivable." Wendy went along with the lie. She had guessed that Cameron's work was top secret, but knew better than to ask. Cameron sometimes forgot that his father had been involved in his own secrets as a test pilot, and years of having first a husband and then a son in the Air Force had taught Wendy not to ask too many questions, even though she had always been able to read both men like a book.

"Yes, well you know, all that money, it can take a lot of time to count."

"Well there's plenty of nice men out there and a few not so nice ones." Wendy gave Vala a wink. "It's a shame you and Cam..." Wendy paused again, smiling at the horrified look on Vala's face. "Don't worry, I know you're not interested him. You don't look at each other that way." Wendy glanced up, staring out the window at the others, looking directly at Daniel. "Not like you do with him.

Following the direction of Wendy's gaze Vala stared at Daniel, then seeing Wendy give her a sideways glance she dropped her head down giving the plate she was drying her total concentration. "Daniel? Oh no, we're not a couple. I mean, not romantically. We're just colleagues, friends, though sometimes I wonder if we even like each other all that much."

"Cameron mentioned that the two of you have been fighting a bit."

Vala looked up in surprise.

Thing between her and Daniel hadn't been good lately, it was true, but were things really that bad? Obviously Mitchell thought so if he had mentioned it to his mom and if she was honest with herself she knew that deep down things weren't good. In the past she had always enjoyed the fights they had, not that they were fights exactly. She had always seen it as more a flirtatious dance, a battle of wits and intellect. There were few men who could keep up with her verbally and it had come as a pleasant surprise to discover that underneath Daniel's staid demeanor was a man of passion.

Lately though their fights had been different. Their attacks against each other seemed more personal as if they intentionally wanted to hurt each other and the more they hurt each other the angrier and more hurtful the fights became. It was an endless cycle and one they seemed unable to stop.

She wished Sam and Teal'c were here, she missed them, far more than she thought possible and their loss just added to everything else she was feeling. She had tried to talk to Daniel about it but all he did was push her away, as if he resented her presence. Mitchell did his best but even he was more subdued, that easy casual smile he generally worn had been less frequent. Somehow the relationship between the three of them had altered and Vala had no idea why or how to fix it and not knowing made her afraid, for without them what else did she have?

At the thoughtful, almost heartbreaking look on Vala's face Wendy quickly dried her hands and pulled Vala into her arms, hugging her close.

The hug caught Vala by surprise and she forgot where she was as she returned the hug, holding tightly, her body sagging against Wendy as she felt the warmth and comfort of another human being. Feeling tears begin to form, she pulled back, quickly composing herself, embarrassed at being seen vulnerable. "Sorry, don't know what came over me."

Wendy she could see that Vala was holding something back but didn't want to push, for now all she could do was be there for her if she needed her.

"How about we finish up these dishes, and then you and I can have some of that leftover pie and a coffee. Maybe even something stronger if you'll like and I'll tell you some of those stories that I promised you last time," she said, reaching out and patting Vala on the arm.

Vala smiled, touched by the offer. "I'd like that."

***S****S***

**The following morning**

Standing by the mantelpiece in the Mitchell's living room Vala picked up a framed photo, a cup of coffee in her other hand. "Who's this? It isn't Darrell is it?"

"No. That's my brother," Cameron replied.

Vala looked at the photo again. Two teenage boys, their arms clasped around each other's shoulder's, smiled back. The taller of the boys was obviously Cameron, the same light brown hair, blue eyes and smile. The other boy was shorter with floppy sun bleached blond hair. Ignoring the hair Vala could see some resemblance; the same blue eyes as Mitchell, a hint of the same smile on his face.

Daniel briefly glanced in the direction of the photo. "You've mentioned him."

Placing the photo back down Vala turned towards Cameron, curious. "He's kinda cute. So where is he? I'd like to meet him."

Even before Vala had finished her sentence, Daniel knew what Cameron's answer was going to be, the answer coming to him as he looked at the photo, the image of the two boys sinking in as he recalled the few times that Cameron had mentioned his younger brother.

"He's dead."

"Oh..." Vala looked from Cameron to Daniel in surprise and confusion as her voice trailed off.

"I'm sorry." Daniel wasn't completely surprised. Cameron had only ever mentioned his brother in terms of them being kids. He had never once talked of his brother as being an adult. Still it didn't make him feel any better, knowing that his instinct had been right.

"I didn't mean..." Vala stopped again as she saw Cameron's Mom standing in the doorway. "I'm sorry. I didn't know..."

"It's okay Vala. It was a long time ago. I guess we tend to forget that some people never knew Nate. Anyway I was about pack you up some sandwiches and a thermos to take with you..." Wendy looked them all, trying to ease some of the discomfort that she could feel in the room.

"And some pie too?" Vala grinned, wanting to put the awkwardness behind her.

"Well I don't think there's any left, but I have some cake."

"Cake sounds good. I'll give you hand."

Only once Vala and Wendy had left did Daniel look directly at Cameron. "How did it happen?"

Cameron didn't say anything for a second; it had been a long time since he had talked about what had happened. It no longer hurt but it wasn't the sort of thing that he spoke about.

"It was… it was an accident. He was driving a tractor and it flipped. He was crushed underneath." Though Daniel tried to hide it Cameron caught the flicker of shock and sympathy in his eyes. He couldn't blame him. The words were shocking, even after all these years. "By the time someone found him it was too late to save him." Cameron recited it like a series of facts, his voice quiet, calm and in control, before it caught very slightly with emotion on the next part. "It was pretty rough for awhile. Mom and Dad. It was... well hard for all of us."

Daniel nodded, understanding and surprised that Cameron had never mentioned any of this in the past few years of working together. It made him realize that though they were close there was still much he didn't know about Cameron and the others.

"How old was he?"

"Fifteen. He already had half the girls in town in love with him." Cameron gave a smile as he remembered.

"Life sucks some times."

"Yeah, it does." The two of them looked at each other in a moment of shared understanding of the tragedies of life that the both of them had experienced before the two of them headed to the kitchen.

***S****S***


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

Pulling out of his parents' driveway Cameron turned on the car radio. Country music filled the air until he moved the dial off the station. Though he knew he was considered by many to be a 'good ole country boy' he didn't particularly like country music, preferring instead the likes of The Eagles, Tom Petty, REM. His taste was definitely more rock than country, the dial catching the first few bars of Jet Airliner by Steve Miller Band. _Perfect_, Cameron thought, settling the dial on the song which was one of his favorites.

Tapping his fingers in time to the music on the steering wheel Cameron caught sight of Daniel through the rear vision mirror. That Daniel had said yes to the idea without any resistance had been a surprise. He had the feeling that going to a fair was not something that was high on Daniel's list of fun things to do. Knowing this he appreciated the effort that he was making.

"So what exactly happens at this fair thing?" asked Vala as she sat sideways in the passenger seat facing Cameron, one leg bent up onto the seat.

"Well, lots of things. There's cotton candy and hotdogs and rides. There the best part. Especially roller coasters. Wait until you try a roller coaster, there's nothing like your first roller coaster. Trust me, you'll love it. It'll be fun,"

Cameron was fairly sure that Vala would enjoy it, glad that she was looking happier than she had last night. Witnessing Vala crying, even if only for a moment, had shocked him and made him realize how much she was hurting. Vala rarely showed anyone that side of herself. He had witnessed it only a few times himself, once when she had lost her memory, the other when they had lost Daniel to Adria. Her strength in coping with difficult situations was one of the things he admired about her, but he knew that even the strongest person couldn't hold it together all the time.

"Roller coaster? What's that like?" Vala looked at them both, curious.

Daniel shook his head. "Don't look at me. I've never been on one."

"Excuse me you've got to be kiddin' me! You've NEVER been on a roller coaster?"

"Umm... no."

"Jackson, you never cease to amaze me. Vala, I can understand. I mean, she's not from around here." Vala smiled, giving a shrug of her shoulders and a nod of her head at Cameron's statement. "But you, well you're a local boy. What on Earth have you been doing for the past thirty odd years?"

"Oh you know the usual. Being a member of SG1, saving the world, dying, saving the world again..."

Cameron smiled. "Fair enough. Though it doesn't quite explain about when you were a kid."

"Ah, yes, a kid. Let's just say that going on roller coasters didn't figure all that prominently."

"Well today we're going to fix that," said Cameron. He knew that Daniel had been raised by foster parents, but he hadn't realized that the rest of Daniel's childhood had been lacking in doing some of the typical things that most kids did. It was beginning to look like going to the fair was a good idea after all.

***S****S***

Daniel wondered what he was doing here. Going to a fair was not something he had ever thought of doing and yet here he was surrounded by one endless mass of noise and color. No, take that back, he _knew _what he was doing here; he was here because Mitchell had asked him. What he really wondered was why, why was he doing this. He could have said no. No to coming to this fair, no to coming on this vacation, but he hadn't. And looking at Cameron and Vala he knew why. They were his friends. They needed him just like he needed them. He wasn't blind; he could see the effect that losing Sam and Teal'c had had on them. Their leaving had affected him also.

It was different to before. The last time they had all gone their separate ways, Jack to Washington, Sam to Area 51, Teal'c with the Jaffa and him to Atlantis. Only he hadn't gotten there. Instead Vala had entered his life again and everything had changed. Teal'c had returned as had Sam. They were a team once more.

Now though it was changing again. The others were moving forward getting on with their lives while he was once again staying behind. And that was really the problem.

The others, Jack, Sam and Teal'c, were moving on, while he had absolutely no idea where he was headed or what he was doing. He was 42, he should know by now what he wanted from life.

God he really was 42, that in itself was hard enough to get his mind around. Where had the time gone? Looking in the mirror at first glimpse he saw the same person that he had been when he had first joined the SGC. It was only when he looked deeper that he could see the subtle differences that time had made.

He knew what some would say. He was having a mid life crisis. It happened to everyone. He just didn't think it would happen to him. It was so... _cliché_. And if he was having a mid life crisis did that mean he was suddenly going to wear open neck shirts and gold medallions and get himself an 18 year old girlfriend called Bambi or Candy. _God please no_, he thought, _that really would be a cliché_.

So the answer was no. He was not having a mid life crisis. No way, definitely not...

***S****S***

"Now was that way cool or not?" Cameron looked at the others, a huge grin on his face.

"We have got to do that again," replied Daniel, his face lit up with excitement, giving a nod.

Vala looked at them both, glancing from one to the other. She really didn't understand Earth's customs sometimes and this was definitely one of those times. "You liked that?"

Daniel thought for a moment before answering, "Actually yes. It was..."

"…a rush." Cameron smiled, pleased to see Daniel looking excited and happy, it was just a pity that Vala wasn't as excited. He really thought she would've loved roller coasters.

"I'm sorry, I don't get it. I've had dates that have been more exciting..."

Daniel and Cameron looked at Vala with silly grins on their faces.

"You didn't like it?" Daniel finally asked, surprised.

"No. I mean it wasn't that I didn't like it. It just wasn't all that exciting. And certainly not a rush. Sorry Mitchell." Vala gave a shrug of her shoulders.

"Not a problem. So it's not your thing. You don't mind if Jackson and I..."

"...go again," finished Daniel, giving a grin and making a bee line for the ticket booth.

"Hey Jackson, wait up. This time we'll sit right up in the front. It's even better," Cameron called out to him before turning his attention to Vala, "You gonna be okay on your own?"

"Of course. I'm going to have a look around. Only I might need some cash if I see a ride I want to try..." Vala held out her hand, giving Mitchell a grin.

"Mmm." Cameron pulled out his wallet and handed her a twenty.

"...I might get hungry also," Vala said, still holding out her hand, causing Cameron to give a small sigh as he handed over another twenty. Stuffing the notes into her jeans pocket, Vala gave him and Daniel a wave as she went off.

"Do you think it's safe to let her go off on her own?" asked Daniel as Mitchell joined him at the ticketing booth.

"How much trouble could she possibly get into?" replied Cameron. Seeing Daniel's look Cameron smiled. "Yeah, I know, stupid question. Let's just hope she doesn't get arrested. I'm not sure how I would explain that to General Landry."

***S****S***

"Any luck?" asked Daniel as he met up with Mitchell who had just come from the shooting gallery.

Cameron shook his head. "No. I'm guessing the same for you?"

"Afraid so."

For a moment they stood there looking around before they headed off in another direction all the while their eyes on the look out for Vala.

"Where the hell can she be?" Cameron said in frustration, giving a quick glance upwards to the sky, "You know I was only kiddin' about the arrested part."

Daniel watched, his own eyes glancing upwards then settling to look at Cameron a slight smirk on his face. "Hoping for some divine intervention?

"It never hurts."

"Some how I don't think that keeping Vala out of trouble is high on the Ascended list of things to do."

"Ain't that the truth," muttered Cameron, his eyes flickering around, moving quickly from person to person, looking for the familiar sight of a tall slim figure dressed in jeans, a blue cami, white shirt, knee high black boots, black hair in pigtails, a saucy slightly mischievous grin on her face. And then he saw her. "Jackson, 10 o'clock."

Daniel turned in the direction that Cameron was staring at as the two of them moved forward. In the distance they could make out Vala's distinctive figure from time to time as it continually vanished and appeared in sight. She seemed to be jumping up and down, her pigtails flying upwards as she did so. Getting closer they finally saw that she was indeed jumping up and down, the result of which was caused by her being inside an inflatable structure which had mesh sides. Stopping at the edge of the structure Cameron and Daniel watched as Vala jumped up and down, her face a light with joy as she laughed and shrieked along with the other kids.

"Looks like our girl found something she likes," said Cameron, folding his arms, a smile on his face.

"Why am I not surprised." Daniel shook his head. Of all the things that she could have found to do, here she was with a group of little kids jumping up and down on a bouncy castle as if it was the greatest thing in the world.

Cameron put his hand on Daniel's shoulder. "She's having fun. Who cares if it's something that a little kid would do. This is Vala remember."

Taking in Cameron's words Daniel realized how silly he was being. Cameron was right, she was having fun. He tended to forget half the time that Vala wasn't from Earth, everything was new and exciting and fun to her. Who cared if she thought that jumping up and down in a bouncy castle was completely and utterly fun. He sometimes envied her that. The way she took such joy from the simplest of things. The way she didn't care what people thought of her. If she wanted to do something she did it, if she wanted to say something, she said it. He wished sometimes that he could be that honest, that free.

Pulling himself out of his thoughts he gave Cameron a nod just as Vala saw them, finally stopping and making her way over to them, bouncy slightly as she did so.

"You've got to try this! It's so much fun. It's ..." spoke Vala to them through the mesh screen.

"... way cool?" finished Cameron.

"Definitely!"

"I think I'll sit this one out."

"Me too," replied Daniel.

"Oh..." Vala tried to keep the disappointment from showing but her mouth betrayed her. She had hoped that they would try this with her. "I understand." She looked from Cameron to Daniel. "You sure you don't want to try?"

Daniel caught the brief moment that Vala bit her bottom lip, something she only did when she was worried or deep in thought. It wasn't something that she did very often and most people were probably unaware of the significance of it or even that she did it at all. But he did. He knew her well enough to know the hidden meaning. And because of that and perhaps because for the first time in ages he felt relaxed, he found himself changing his mind

"Okay, I'll come in, but don't you DARE tell anyone about this. Either of you." Daniel pointed a finger at them both as he headed to the entrance booth, muttering as he walked away, "I know I'm going to regret this."

With a smirk on her face Vala moved back into the middle of the castle, waiting for Daniel to join her. Once he had, she glanced at his feet, her smile getting bigger as she saw the Simpson socks he was wearing.

Seeing her look, Daniel glared. "Don't say anything. They were a birthday present from Jack. He has a weird sense of humor."

"My lips are sealed." Vala made a zipping motion across her mouth then took Daniel's hand in hers, facing him.

For a second or so they stood there then Vala gave a bounce, followed by Daniel, whose bounce was even smaller, in fact it was barely a bounce at all.

"You have to do better than that."

Daniel sighed, and looked down. Looking not at his feet or Vala's which were clad in a pair of blue socks but instead he looked at his hand which was clasped in hers. Her hand was warm and soft and seemed so fragile in his. He had never thought of Vala as being fragile before. She seemed to be made of steel most of the time. Yet he knew that underneath she was just as messed up as the rest of them, more so even. She just didn't show it very often. He could relate to that. He wasn't good at showing his feelings himself. It was one of the reasons why he had been shutting himself away in his office so often lately. He missed Sam and Teal'c. Missed how they knew him so well. How they knew when he needed to vent, to have someone listen. And how they knew when he needed time alone with his thoughts. Vala and Cameron didn't know him as well, yet. That kind of friendship took time.

Giving another sigh, he looked back up at Vala, seeing her face filled with a mixture of hope and trepidation. He decided to take the plunge; maybe he could be honest after all. "I don't know how."

Vala stared at him for a second, then giving a smile she took his other hand in hers. "Don't think about what people might say. Don't think about that you might look silly. It doesn't matter. Just take a breath and let go." With that Vala bounced up again.

_Just let go,_ he thought. _She makes it sound so easy. Maybe it is._

Daniel took a deep breath and gave a bounce, followed by another and then another, each one getting higher and higher. Vala stayed with him, matching her jumps with his, the momentum from them both causing them to lift off the surface by a foot or more, there arms going upwards together giving them more lift to go higher. Daniel found himself smiling as he watched Vala's pigtails flap about in time to the jumps, her eyes alight with laughter. Letting go of her hands he bounced around on his own, making a circular pattern as Vala followed him, the colored balls moving up and down with them. It was a maze of color. And it was the most beautiful thing he had seen in a long time.

Suddenly he was aware that Cameron had joined them and was bouncing even higher. Daniel gave a small chuckle as he got a quick glimpse of a pair of Scooby Doo socks that were on Cameron's feet.

Slowly down he raised one eyebrow, inclining his head towards the socks, questioning. "Scooby Doo?"

"Hey, looks whose talkin'. Scooby Doo is cool and you've gotta admit that Daphne is pretty hot."

"Personally I prefer Velma."

"Figures." Cameron arched his own eyebrow back at Daniel, as the three of them went up into the air. Yep coming to the fair was definitely a good idea.

***S****S***


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five**

Walking into the bedroom Vala smiled as she viewed the scene before her. It was instantly obvious as to who's side of the room was whose.

Mitchell's had the casual messiness of someone who was relaxed in his environment and at home. The bed covers pulled up but still rumpled, an Air Force sweatshirt thrown casually on the end of the bed, a still slightly damp towel draped over the back of a chair, a copy of Sports Illustrated Magazine with its open pages laying face down on the nightstand next to an empty coffee mug.

Daniel's side on the other hand was neat and orderly, the bed perfectly made up, his overnight bag tucked almost out of sight at the foot of his bed next to a large sea chest. The only real sign of his presence were the handful of items neatly arranged on the nightstand, a comb, a toiletries bag, a book he was reading combined with the faint smell of his aftershave which still lingered in the room, mingling in with Mitchell's own brand.

Vala trailed her fingers over the nightstand, picking up the said bottle of aftershave which was peeping out of the top of his toiletries bag. Unscrewing the cap she took a whiff, her mind instantly filling with memories of Daniel. The first time she met him, strapped into the chair on board the Prometheus, him fiddling with his glasses as he looked at some artifact, the feel of his arms holding her close as he had comforted her. Smiling she replaced the cap and carefully placed it back where it belonged. For the first time in what seemed like a very long time, Vala felt the tightness that had been in her chest these past months loosen and she realized that what she was feeling was happiness. It had been a good day, a great day. Everything really was going to be okay.

Peering at his book, trying to see the title, Vala felt that tingle she got when she knew she was doing something that others might consider a little bit naughty. Not that she was doing anything wrong exactly, she had just as much right to be up here as anyone, after all her bag was sitting right there on top of the chest. Snooping though always brought a tingling thrill.

Snooping was a way of life for Vala. As a child she had done it mostly out of curiosity. People's secrets had held a fascination for her. As an adult it had been about survival. Knowing people's secrets gave her control, something she could barter with.

Since joining SG-1 the need to snoop had lessen. Here were people who were willing to accept her, to trust her and she trusted them back. It was a unique feeling for Vala. In her past there had been too few people who had trusted her and even fewer that she had trusted in return. She had learned early on about deceit, about betrayal. She knew that to trust someone only ever meant pain and she had never been willing to go down that path. That is until Daniel and SG-1.

Her feelings for Daniel were so conflicted. He was patronizing, condescending and downright impossible to be around and at times she was torn between wanting to slap him or kiss him, anything to get him to shut up. He preferred books to people, the past to the present, and yet despite all that he excited her, interested her in a way that no other man had in a very long time, if perhaps ever. From the moment they had met on board the Prometheus she had felt that undercurrent of attraction between them.

It was surprising to say the less. He was not the usual kind of man she went for. Then again she was quite aware that she wasn't the kind of woman that Daniel went for either. Still they had come a long way from that first encounter on the Prometheus. She now knew that despite appearances Daniel was also brave, caring and had a wit that match her own. The attraction was still there simmering below the surface but their relationship had become something more. She felt a connection to him. He was no longer just a good looking and intriguing man who she could flirt with. Now there was something else. A friendship. A close friendship. A friendship that she shared not only with him but the rest of SG-1.

Lately though she had been finding it difficult. Sam had left and Muscles had followed, only adding to the pain she was feeling. Mitchell tried his best even going so far as to stop by her quarters with a mochaccino and a copy of Vanity Fair magazine, chatting with her as they drank their coffees. It hadn't been quite the same as going out with Sam for a girl's day out but she had appreciated the fact that he had at least tried.

Daniel on the other hand had pulled away from them both. Oh he went with them on missions, but at the end of day he'd shut himself away in his office, turning down offers of a movie night or going out for a bite to eat. She didn't understand it, just when she needed him the most he was shutting her out, leaving her alone with her thoughts, thoughts that kept intruding upon her mind, fueling the pain she was feeling. Now though she felt the first sign that she would get through this, that she wasn't quite so alone after all.

Staring down at the book Vala saw that it wasn't in a language she recognized, her curiosity began to fade until she noticed the edge of an piece paper sticking out from inside the book. To most people it would have been unimportant, disregarded as nothing more than a book mark. To Vala it was out of place, she knew that Daniel always used a leather book mark, one that had been a gift from Sam from the first year that SG-1 had been together. And because it was out of the ordinary for Daniel her curiosity was piqued again. Pausing just for a second she listened out for the sounds of someone approaching. Hearing nothing she picked the book up, sat down on the bed and opened it to where the piece of paper was, not really expecting much.

It was a letter, the envelope underneath addressed to Daniel's home address. Folding it out she skimped through it, not quite taking in at first what was written, before she stopped and started from the beginning again, her concentration now totally focused on the contents.

Several minutes later Vala's hand fell back to rest on her thigh, shaking slightly, the letter still clasped in her fingers. For a moment she shut her eyes as her chest clamp up in tightness, a band of pain wrapping around her as if to squeeze every last drop of breath from her lungs.

Daniel was leaving.

Leaving SG-1.

Leaving her.

She looked down at the letter again, tears swimming in her eyes, blurring her vision, before she quickly blinked them away.

No she wouldn't cry.

She never cried.

At least she never use to.

She had only ever cried once and that had been when her mother had died. Since then she had never cried, not once. Not when her stepmother had sold her into slavery, not when Qetesh had taken over her body and not when the Tok'ra had freed her and she had been abandoned to the people who had hated her.

Yet since she had arrived on Earth she had shed tears a few times. It was so unlike her and yet something about these people had tapped into a part of herself she had thought long forgotten.

But not now.

She would not cry now.

Not when she had been doing so well.

She had almost lost it last night when Cameron's mom had hugged her. In that brief moment she had been a little girl, a little girl being held by her mother before she remembered where she was and that Cameron's mom wasn't her mom.

She knew she should be angry. And she was. Angry that Daniel had kept this from her. That he had kept it from all of them because she was sure that Mitchell didn't know either, nor did General O'Neill. Because if they did, Mitchell and the General would both be doing their best to find out why and to change Daniel's mind.

It was that, that hurt the most. Not that he was leaving, though the thought of that was painful, but that he had kept it secret. That he had hidden it from all of them, from her. They were meant to be friends. Friends talked about things like this. They didn't go off and do things in secret. They didn't go and leave.

First Sam, then Teal'c and now Daniel.

It was too much. She couldn't, wouldn't... do this anymore. This is what happened when you trusted someone. Why had she thought that Daniel would be any different. She had been fooling herself all this time; she really had believed that he trusted her, that he cared for her, that he was her friend, that there was a possibility that they could be more than friends. Only he had done this to her. He had lied to her. On top of everything else it was too much...

Pain surged through her, causing a small gasp to escape her lips. With a shaking hand she carefully folded the letter up, placing it back inside the book and putting the book on the nightstand, adjusting it to where she thought it had originally been. Satisfied she smoothed out the bedcovers so that no trace remained of where she had been sitting. Then she wiped her face with the edge of her t-shirt removing any signs that she had almost been crying, giving her cheeks a quick short sharp slap with her fingers to bring the color back into her face.

She took a deep breath. She could do this. She would do this.

She would go downstairs and pretend that nothing was wrong. She had been doing it for these past few months what difference would a few extra days make. She would smile and laugh and everything would be all right.

She was Vala Mal Doran. The master of schemes. A thief and a liar. Well today she would prove how good a liar she was.

She would not let Daniel know that she knew.

She would not let him know that he had just broken her heart.

***S****S***


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six**

Standing just outside of the kitchen door Vala took a deep breath, taking a tighter hold on her emotions. Composed she plastered a smile on her face and walked in.

Standing by the center aisle was Mitchell, surrounding by a variety of foods which were carefully laid out. Behind him was a stack of freshly washed dishes standing upright in a dish drier. In front of him was a cleared area where he was currently mixing a bowl of what looked like brown sticky goo. It reminded her of something that you would use to grease a machine part and definitely not something that you would eat.

Glancing up, his mind focused on what he was doing, Cameron only half took in the thought that Vala was standing in the doorway. For a brief second something flicked within his mind that something was wrong but he couldn't quite put his finger on what it was, before he noticed that Vala didn't have the magazine that she had said she had been going to get.

"What happened to the magazine?" he asked, bending his head back down, concentrating once more on the task at hand, the thought that something was wrong fading from his mind.

Vala moved further into the kitchen. "Oh that, I decided it was much more entertaining to watch you try and cook than read some silly magazine. By the way, what _are _you cooking? Because looking at that I've got to tell you I'm not that keen on trying whatever it is."

"Yeah right, says the lady who eats just about anything. This I'll have you know is pecan pie. Or at least it will be once I've finished."

Dipping a spoon into the mixture Cameron held it out to Vala. "Try it." Seeing her hesitation he tried again. "Trust me."

"Mmm." Vala looked doubtful as she took the spoonful into her mouth. "Oh, it's sugar," she said in surprise, the words coming out slightly slurred as she spoke with the food still in her mouth, licking her lips after she had swallowed.

"Well yeah, but not just sugar. It's sugar, butter, corn syrup, eggs and vanilla. Once I heat this up and then cool it a bit, we then add the roasted pecans and pour it into that pie crust there, add some more pecans, put into the oven to cook for a bit and then voila we'll be eating pecan pie with vanilla ice-cream in no time."

"Sounds good," said Vala, giving Mitchell a smile. It really did sound good, she only wished her stomach would agree with her and stop aching like it was now. "So what are you and everyone else going to be having?"

"Ha, very funny. We are going to be eating barbecued pork spare ribs, black eyed peas, potato salad, coleslaw, fried green tomatoes and cornbread, just like my grandma use to make. Speaking of which..." Wiping his hands on a tea towel Cameron went over to a large fridge. "How about I'll make you up grandma's favorite drink. It's called a mint julep."

"It sounds dig..."

"Its got bourbon in it," said Cameron, cutting Vala off as he took out a tray of ice cubes and placed it on the bench, only to go over to a large dresser in the connecting dining room to take out a bottle of bourbon and a glass.

"Make it double," she replied before muttering quietly to herself, "In fact the whole bottle would be good."

***S****S***

Daniel watched as Cameron's dad got the grill ready. He always found it fascinating how some men seemed to love barbecuing; Jack was certainly fond of it himself. Mr. Mitchell, Frank he reminded himself, seemed to know what he was doing, handling the grill with ease as he laid the coals in the bottom, building up a nice low fire.

"Is there anything I can do?" Daniel wanted to help, knowing that it was meant to be the three of them cooking dinner tonight, giving Wendy a night off.

"I think she's right, though you could bring over those spare ribs. Once the heat's built up we can start cooking."

Daniel went over to the table picking up the plate of chilled spare ribs that Cameron had prepared earlier this morning before they had left for the fair and brought them over, placing them on the serving area at the end of the barbecue.

"So Cam tells me you're a linguist. That you help the Air Force translate documents."

"Yes, well it's mostly mundane stuff, legal documents, that kind of thing. Nothing really all that exciting."

Frank gave a chuckle. "You know for someone who works for the Air Force you're really bad at lying. Worse than Cam in fact. I would've thought that the Air Force gave you training in that kind of thing, you certainly could use a bit more of a convincing cover."

Daniel looked at Frank in surprise, the surprise fading to be replaced with some embarrassment as he realized how obvious his lie had been. "Sorry. I wish I could tell you what I, what we, really do, but I'm afraid I can't."

"Top secret, I know. Been there myself. Not easy having to lie, especially to those closest around you. Secrets only cause problems, never solves them."

For a moment Daniel wondered if he could talk to Frank, get an outsider's opinion but he was interrupted before he could say anything.

"So what are my two handsome men up to out here?"

Both Daniel and Frank looked over to see Vala walking towards them, a large glass one hand and two bottles of beer and a bottle opener in the other.

"Daniel was just telling me about his work translating legal documents. How's Cam doing in there?" said Frank, giving Vala a smile, changing the subject.

"Oh, Cameron's doing just fine. You know I could seriously get involved with your son. He cooks, he makes me alcoholic beverages, all that's missing is the sex part..." Vala flashed Daniel and Frank a wink, giving them both a saucy grin as she opened up one of the bottles of beer and passed it to Frank.

***S****S***

Vala laid on the couch wide awake. She couldn't sleep, no matter how hard she tried.

It had been a long and eventful day. So far she was pulling off her lie very well, no one suspected a thing, but lying here, alone at night it was harder to hide from the truth, to hide from the thoughts and feelings that kept invading her mind.

With a sigh she sat abruptly up and pulled back the covers. Slipping her legs out, she sat there for a moment in her pajama bottoms and singlet top, her mind too confused to think clearly. She felt shattered and lost; the tightening in her chest was as bad as it ever had been. It felt as if she had a lump stuck fast in the middle of her chest and nothing she could do would make it go away.

With some effort she got up, switching a lamp on, going over to her overnight bag. Pulling out her toiletries bag, she unzipped it and took out a bottle of Mylanta tablets. She knew that Dr Lam had been concerned about this sudden onset of heartburn but after she had run some tests she could find no obvious physical cause for Vala's pain. Vala had her own suspicions about what was causing the pain but she wasn't comfortable talking to Dr Lam about it. The truth was she didn't know how to talk to anyone about it, not even Daniel or Cameron, so she had kept it to herself. They couldn't understand what she was going through. It had been over three months now and yet the pain hadn't lessened instead it was worse than before.

Daniel's leaving wasn't helping, it had only added to the pain she was feeling. How could he? He and Mitchell and the missions had been the only thing keeping her going, the only thing keeping her sane. She didn't want to feel this way anymore.

As she chewed and swallowed the tablet, the minty taste filling her mouth, she found herself drawn to the photo of Cameron and his brother. To lose a child was a terrible thing.

"Vala, is everything all right?"

Startled by the voice of Cameron's mom, Vala turned around. Giving one final swallow, licking her lips, she gave Wendy a small slight awkward smile. "I'm fine, just an upset stomach. I think I might've eaten just a bit too much."

Wendy didn't believe this for one moment, her instincts telling her that behind the smile and the words something was very wrong with Vala. It wasn't just the fighting with Daniel that was getting to her, there was, Wendy was sure of it, something more, something that was causing the pain that she sensed in her. She was fairly certain though that Vala wouldn't tell her. She didn't know Vala very well but from what Cam had told her and her own observations she sensed that Vala was strong and stubborn and independent. Good traits to have but not the kind of traits that would make her the kind of person who would easily reveal was was really going on.

"How about I make us a nice hot cup of milk?" said Wendy, deciding to go along with Vala's led, at least for now.

Vala sat back down on the couch. "That sounds lovely."

For the next several minutes she sat there, leaning back into the sofa, tucking her legs up while she listen to the faint sounds of Wendy moving about in the kitchen.

Arriving back Wendy handed Vala a large mug of hot milk, the scent of vanilla and cinnamon drifting up from it as Vala took her first sip while Wendy sat opposite. For a moment the two women sat there, sipping gently at their drinks, not saying a word all the while Wendy kept a discreet eye on Vala, noticing that Vala's gaze was focused on the photo of Cam and Nate on the mantelpiece.

"I never knew that Cameron had a brother. It must've been... terrible for you. To lose a child like that," Vala said quietly, her words clearly heard in the quiet of the night.

"It was. At the time I thought I would never get over it. But as callous as it sounds you do. You learn to live with it. It becomes part of who you are and you move forward."

For a few seconds it was quiet again, Wendy because she felt that Vala was about to tell her something important and Vala because she was thinking things through before she spoke again, "I had a daughter," Vala paused, trying to put her thoughts into words, "She's dead too. I never really knew her though. She was just this young woman who was there and then she was gone."

Wendy heard the pain in Vala's voice and knew the suffering she was going through. She wanted to go over to her and hold her in her arms and let her cry the grief out, but she knew that if she did Vala would shut down again and pretend that everything was all right so she held back her mothering instincts, knowing that perhaps she could help Vala in another way.

"When Nate died it was hard for all of us. After we buried him, had had the funeral, we carried on. Frank and Cam grieved and I felt nothing. It was if the pain was so great that it had hollowed out my heart. And yet I could feel it within me, like there was a weight strapped to my chest that got heavier and heavier as time went by. Then one day, it must of been months after, I was all alone in the house I came across one of Nate's shirts. Silly thing really, a shirt of all things. And suddenly I felt like I was suffocating. I don't know why but for some reason I went and sat in the car, the one that Frank and the boys had been working on. It felt safe there. Familiar. And you know what I did?"

Vala said nothing, knowing that the question required no answer.

"I sat there and I screamed. I screamed so loud I thought the windows would shatter. And I kept on screaming. I screamed until my voice was hoarse and I couldn't scream anymore. And even then I kept on screaming. Even though I could barely make a sound. And the tears... god the tears, they wouldn't stop. They just kept coming. I don't remember falling asleep, but I did. I fell asleep right there in that car, clutching Nate's shirt in my hands until Frank found me. And that night we talked all night. We talked about Nate, about how much we loved him. About how lucky we were to have each other, to have Cam. And I knew we would get through it. That we would carry on without him, no matter how hard it would be."

Getting up and going over to Vala, Wendy reached out with her hand and ran her fingers over Vala's hair, brushing it back. "I'm so sorry about your daughter. What you're feeling ... its okay to feel that way. Just remember there are people who care about you. There's nothing you can say that will shock them. Talk to them, to your friends. Daniel, I'm sure is a good man and Cam will listen. Give them a chance. Talk to them. And know that you can always talk to me and to Frank. You're not alone in this."

***S****S***


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven**

Dressed in his running gear of t-shirt, sweatpants and Air Force sweatshirt Cameron quietly walked down the stairs, his sock clad feet barely making a sound as he moved downward, his running shoes in one hand. Sitting down on a step near the bottom he pulled on his shoes, deftly doing up the laces as he listened to the steady and comforting quiet of the house. It felt good to be home. Listening to the sounds of the morning he could hear birds chirping outside, the tick tock of the clock in the hallway and the faint sounds of someone moving about. Hearing this last sound he raised his head up and listened, focusing on it, trying to work out where it was coming from.

Satisfied that all was quiet upstairs he moved to the back of the house, the sound of movement becoming louder. Walking into the kitchen Cameron stopped, his eyes latching on to the last person he expected to see up and about.

Within SGC it was well known how difficult it was to wake up Vala in the morning. The woman liked her sleep and many had learned, rather painfully, the cost of trying to get her out of bed before she was ready. The throwing of shoes, boots and alarm clocks had been known to greet those who had done so. It wouldn't of been so bad except that Vala had a surprisingly good aim considering she worn an eye mask when she slept. Cameron remembered all to well the sight of a combat boot coming at him at full speed when he had gone to get her one morning, ignoring to his peril the comments that Sam and Daniel had shared when he had announced his attention. It was a good thing he was fast on his feet otherwise the boot would of taken his head clean off or at the very least given him a rather nasty black eye instead it just grazed passed his shoulder, hitting the wall behind him with a very loud thud.

Yep, Vala wasn't an early morning kind of person. And yet here she was up at 6.30 in the morning. Even more surprising was the fact that she cooking and from the smell of it, it was pretty damn good.

"Well look at you. I never had you down as the domesticated type," said Cameron, doing his best to hold back a chuckle as he caught sight of the frilly apron that was tied around Vala's waist as she straightened up. It was a look he never thought he would see on Vala and momentarily wished he had a camera on hand so that he could take a photo, Sam and Teal'c would never believe it without one.

Vala concentrated on piling the hot, fresh from the oven, biscuits into a basket. "That just shows how little you know. Besides being resourceful, intelligent and alluringly attractive, I have a great many other skills, cooking being one of them."

"Nice to see that you haven't let any of that ruin your modest streak, though I must admit I do dig the apron, very Donna Reed."

"Who?" Vala glanced up at Mitchell in confusion.

"Never mind," he said giving a small smile, "Anyhow it looks great, though I'm kinda surprised to see you up so early, you usually need a canon going off to get you out of bed at this time of the day."

Vala poked her tongue out at him in reply.

Giving a chuckle, Cameron reached out to grab a biscuit, only for Vala to slap his hand away.

"Geez Mom, can't I have one now?" said Cameron teasingly, not noticing that the smile on Vala's face froze momentarily or the flicker of pain that flashed in her eyes, before she recovered and the mask that she had been wearing all these months was once again in place.

"You'll have to wait until everyone else is up. Anyway weren't you going for a run?" Somehow Vala managed to keep her voice the steady as she turned around, wiping her hands on a tea towel that was hanging nearby, busying herself with mundane tasks as she fought to keep control.

"Yeah, yeah, okay I get the hint. I'll be back in about an hour," said Cameron as he went outside.

Vala's shoulder's sagged in relief once he was gone, a loud sigh escaping from her lips as her hands gripped the kitchen bench. Biting her bottom lip tears glimmered in her eyes. She blinked, quickly pushing the tears back as Mitchell jog pass the window, heading in the direction of the road.

***S****S***

"Well I must say Vala this is a great breakfast you've put on for us." Frank poured himself a glass of juice, the unusual combination of freshly squeezed oranges and strawberries that made up the drink proving to a favorite amongst those present.

"These biscuits are wonderful," agreed Wendy as she took another bite of the one that was in her hand.

Vala watched them, pleased that her decision to make breakfast had gone down well. "Their called Amaris Valatan. It means the day and the night. Amaris, the day, is filled with herbs and seeds that grow in the sunlight, Valatan, the one you're eating is the night. It has berries and honey that comes from a particular flower that only flowers at night. At least that's how they are made traditionally; I sort of had to make do with what I could find."

"Amaris Valatan," said Wendy slowly, sounding out the words carefully, "They sound lovely, is that Romanian?"

"Yes, it is." Vala played along with the lie, remembering the cover that SGC had created for her then gave a smile as she remembered something else, something that she hadn't thought of in a long time. "My mother named me after Valatan. She use to say that my hair was like the night sky but that Valatan hadn't sounded right for a girl so she shorten it to Vala."

Sipping his coffee Daniel watched Vala closely as he sat across from her. Her mother had chosen an appropriate name. It suited her, he thought, taking in the blackness of her hair that seemed darker than usual against her skin, noticing for the first time that she seemed a little pale. And had she lost some weight also? It was hard to tell with her being so slim but her face seemed thinner, her eyes bigger, her cheekbones more pronounced. He had suspected that she was missing Sam and Teal'c but perhaps she was taking their absence harder than he'd realized.

In the past he would have talked to her expressing his concerns but for the last several weeks things between them hadn't been good. Every conversation they had seemed to end in an argument. Normally he could handle her need for attention and the constant questions that she usually bombarded him with but his patience had been a little thin lately.

It wasn't that he didn't care for her because he did, just not in a romantic way. Having any kind of romantic relationship with Vala was most definitely out of the question. Vala wasn't girlfriend material, at least not for him, they were just … so wrong for each other; a relationship of that nature with her would only end in disaster. If he was to have that kind of relationship it needed to be with someone reliable, someone who had patience, who wouldn't mind taking second place to his work. These were definitely not qualities that Vala had.

Of course it wasn't just about Vala, he had his own issues to deal with. Sam and Teal'c's leaving, though not unexpected, was still hard. The last time they had gone their separate ways he had at least the opportunity to go and work at Atlantis to look forward to, the excitement of finally going helping to lessen the loss at the departure of his friends.

This time though he had nothing to focus on to help him cope with them being away. With them gone and things much quieter now that the Ori had been defeated he was left with too much time to think.

He was doing a lot of that lately.

Thinking.

Thinking about the past, about the future, about families and relationships.

His own upbringing had been less than typical. Traveling from place to place, spending his days playing around ancient monuments, learning languages that few others knew; that had been his childhood, one filled with loving parents and wondrous things. By the time he was 8 he already had a rudimentary knowledge of hieroglyphics, could speak Dutch, French and Arabic and his knowledge of history exceeded his years, particularly those of ancient civilizations. Having two academics for parents had made him an unusual kid, though he hadn't known it at the time. It was only after their deaths that he had discovered how different he had been to other children.

If Nick, his grandfather, had taken him in it might of have been different, but Nick had always been reclusive even more so after the death of his wife and later on his daughter. Raising an 8 year old boy had not been part of the plan. Who after all would take a child to live in the jungles of Belize pursing dreams of a Mayan crystal skull? Not Nick that was for sure.

Instead he had gone into foster care and Nick had vanished from his life only to send the odd postcard and parcel over the years. To cope he took refuge in the familiar. Learning about the past, burying himself in books; these were things he knew and it comforted him in a way that nothing else did. Life was funny. Even without his parents and Nick in his life he had turned out to be almost exactly like them, an academic, a scholar.

Of course that was until he joined Stargate Command. Since then his life had opened up in ways he had never dreamed possible. He was no longer just an academic now he was so much more, a diplomat, a soldier, an explorer. But was it worth it? He just wasn't sure anymore.

Perhaps it was time to move on. He had spent 10 years in the Stargate Program. He had no regrets but maybe it was time for something different. They had fought so many wars, the Goa'uld, the Replicators, the Ori and through it all he had coped with the lost of his wife, the death of Janet, his own death and ascension and de-ascension not to mention all the other challenges they had faced.

He was tired, tired of it all, maybe even burnt out. He needed a break, needed to do something different, to get away from it for awhile. Working on an archaeological dig seemed like the perfect opportunity. He was after all an archaeologist and working on a dig site had its appeal, the slow, painstaking uncovering of evidence, the putting together of clues, formulating theories about a group of people based entirely on the artifacts found, all of these things he had missed. True he got to do some of that at SGC but working on a dig was different type of lifestyle, one that suited his current mood.

He was at a crossroads. Could he really give up being a member of SG-1? And what of Vala and Mitchell, what effect would his leaving have on them? Despite the recent difficulties they were his friends, he had no wish to leave them in the lurch with his departure, knowing they would both take it hard. That's of course if he did leave. He still hadn't made up his mind and being here with them and Cameron's parents had got him wondering if leaving was really the only option.

***S****S***


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight**

**Stargate Command, Cheyenne Mountain**

"Come in."

General Landry sat at his desk pen poised in his hand as he flipped over yet another piece of paper adding to the completed stack that he had already signed though the unsigned stack still seemed just as large as when he began. This was part of the job that he hadn't been told about. Signing requisitions forms, transfer papers, memos etc had never been part of the job description, yet it seemed that the higher one's rank was the more paper work there was as well.

The knock at his door was at least a distraction.

"Have you got a moment?"

Hearing his daughter's voice Hank looked up giving her a smile, gesturing to a chair in front of his desk.

"Carolyn. Come in. How was the holiday?"

Coming into the office Carolyn returned her father's smile. "It was good, thanks. Mom says hi by the way."

Hank watched as she sat down, noticing how her left hand unconsciously smoothed out the material of her dark grey trousers as she did so. The movement made him smile; the act of smoothing out her clothes was something she had done since she was little, an unconscious habit that she did as a way of bringing herself reassurance. "I'll give her ring, maybe we can all go out for dinner now that you're back."

"That'll be nice, she'll like that."

"I'm guessing you're not here to talk about dinner plans," said Hank, getting straight down to business.

Carolyn gave an inward smile. Her father wasn't a man for small talk especially when there was work to discuss; it was a trait that she shared with him. In the past she would have denied that there was any similarity between; that she could now see how similar they were showed how far their relationship had come in the past two years.

"It's about Vala."

Hank laid the pen in his hand down on the desk, his attention curious. "Oh?"

"Before I went away Vala came to see me…"

**Flashback**

"Well, your blood pressure is a little high," said Carolyn releasing the cuff from Vala's arm, "Can you just lay down here for me."

Carolyn watched as Vala quietly leaned back on the bed, laying her head on the pillow. Having a visitor at this late hour had been unexpected, especially when the visitor was Vala. Though she knew that Vala had been making a bit of a nuisance of herself with some of the others on the base she had so far avoided the infirmary, that is until tonight.

Seeing her at first, standing in the doorway of the infirmary, Carolyn had managed to suppress the sigh she had felt at the interruption. She loved this time of night, the midnight hour, the time when most people were asleep in their beds. Working at the base was no different to the outside world; most of the staff had headed home long ago and those that remained were either asleep or quietly going about their work. For Carolyn this was the time she got the most work done, the stillness of it calmed her filling her with a kind of peace. Focused she had already finished answering all her e-mails and was half way through reading the latest lab reports when Vala had arrived. Her annoyance at the interruption had quickly faded when Vala had admitted to feeling a little unwell.

Easing Vala's t-shirt up Carolyn gently pressed down on the edge of Vala's stomach. "Does that hurt?"

"No."

Moving her hands further across Carolyn pressed down again, being careful to not press too hard but firm enough for her to feel anything should there be anything unusual to feel. "How about that?"

"Mmm, a little maybe. It's not really painful, more… just uncomfortable."

Carolyn continued pressing down a few more times, getting the same kind of response from Vala. Finished she pulled Vala's shirt back down.

"Well, I can't feel anything untoward, other than a little tenderness. You say you've been getting this pain on and off for the last few weeks?"

Sitting back up, Vala nodded her head. "Yes. It feels like something's stuck, like a kind of pressure. Mostly here but sometimes here." Vala moved her hand from her stomach to her breast bone, touching it in the middle.

"It sounds like it could be acid reflux." Seeing Vala's confused look, Carolyn smiled. "Indigestion. Eating too much or too fast can sometimes cause it, certain foods…" Pulling out a thermometer she placed it in Vala's ear. "Have you been eating anything different to what you've had in the past?"

"No I don't think so," said Vala as Carolyn took the thermometer out.

"Well your temperature is normal which rules out any kind of infection for now." Glancing down Carolyn took a good look at Vala, noticing traces of puffiness and dark shadows under her eyes. "How've you been sleeping?" she asked.

"Okay." Vala saw the faint look of disbelief on Carolyn's face and realized that she would need to tell her something that at least resembled the truth if she was to avoid anymore questions. "Just a little restless, the odd weird dream."

"Nightmares?"

"Sometimes." Vala gave a casual shrug of her shoulders, trying to make it seem as if it was no big deal. "It's probably that arid reflux thing."

"Acid reflux," corrected Carolyn, giving Vala a small smile, "Well, I can give you something that will help with that but I want you to come back and see me if it doesn't get any better. We can run some tests, see if anything's going on. In the meantime I suggest keeping away from coffee, spicy foods, anything too acidic like orange juice… I'll give you list of things to avoid."

"Okay," said Vala, giving a nod of her head and sliding her legs around so that she was sitting on the edge of the bed.

Carolyn paused as she placed the thermometer back on the tray. She didn't know Vala very well, certainly not on a personal level, but she did know was that it wasn't like her to be so co-operative about following medical instructions. That along with the obvious signs of lack of sleep and what she had heard around the base lately made her wonder if there was more going on than Vala was admitting.

Though she knew she was a good physician, an excellent one if she was being honest, she was also quite aware that she wasn't the kind of doctor that patients felt they could confide their most personal problems to. Not that her bedside manner was lacking; she was compassionate, patient and highly dedicated to doing the utmost best for those under her care, but she knew that she lacked that ability to form real personal connections with her patients.

Still she needed to try.

"Vala, you know if anything's bothering you, you can talk to me about it."

"Me? Oh, I'm fine. Really. Nothing that a good night's sleep can't fix." Vala flashed Carolyn one of her large smiles, keeping her voice light.

Carolyn looked at her for a moment. She didn't quite believe the smile and cheery tone but decided against pushing it further. "Okay but I want you to come back if the pain gets worse. In the mean time I'll give you something to help calm your stomach and a list of foods and drinks to avoid, hopefully that should settle things down."

**End Flashback**

"I take it that the treatment didn't help?" asked Hank.

"With Vala it's hard to tell." Carolyn gave a deep sigh. "She's not the most forthcoming person."

Though Carolyn's face revealed little, Hank knew his daughter was troubled about what was going on. Her compassion was one of the things that made her such a good doctor. "You think she's hiding something?"

"I can't be a hundred percent sure, but yes I do. Physically everything seems normal but I'm more concerned about her emotional well-being than anything else. The high blood pressure, the stomach upsets, the sleeping problems, even the fighting with Doctor Jackson; they're all symptoms of a deeper problem."

Noticing that her father didn't seem surprised by her announcement Carolyn carried on. "It's not just Vala either. Both Doctor Jackson and Colonel Mitchell have been displaying less than typical behavior. Their irritable, withdrawn and I'm not the only one to notice."

As Hank got up and went over to the coffee pot sitting underneath the observation window, pouring himself a cup, drinking it slowly as he stared out of the window, the time seemed to stretched out as Carolyn waited for his response.

"We've been aware of what's been happening," he finally said, pausing as he took a mouthful of coffee, "Do you think it's serious?"

"To be honest I don't know, but I'm worried. SG-1 are our front line team and all three members are showing signs of stress. If we don't look after them it could all…"

"…blow up in our face," finished Hank his tone serious as he turned to give Carolyn an intent look.

The worry now more visible on her face, she gave him a small nod.

Not saying another word Hank back over to his desk, coffee cup in hand, to pick up a piece of paper that was sitting separate from the rest, still waiting for his signature. He knew he needed to sign it but was reluctant to do so, hoping that some kind of divine inspiration would come to him. Unfortunately it looked like that wasn't going to be happening today.

Carolyn silently took the piece of paper that he held out to her with a questioning look and quickly scanned over its contents, comprehension dawning on her face. Reading it she knew that logically it made sense; she had thought the very same thing but emotionally it all felt so… wrong somehow. That her father was considering this taking this action showed just how serious the situation had become.

Looking up she failed to keep the emotions from her face, revealing a mixture of sadness and resignation at the decision that had been made. "You're going to stand them down?"

Hank gave her a nod, his face grim as he confirmed what she had just read. "I've already spoken to Colonel Reynolds. SG-3 will take over as the lead team until we can sort this mess out."

"They're not going to like it," Carolyn replied.

"No I don't suppose they will, but as you said SG1 are our front line team. If they're showing signs of stress we can't risk having them out there, not with everything that is at stake." Hank paused, this time giving his daughter his own look of sadness and resignation. "I don't like having to do this Carolyn but as of today SG1 are out of the roster until further notice."

***S***S***


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine**

With a firm tug Cameron pulled off the large white cloth that covered his Dad's latest project.

Letting out a low whistle Cameron went over to the car that was now on display in the barn, his hand stroking it's front left side, feeling the smooth cool surface of metal underneath his touch. "Nice," he said as he crouched down facing the front of it, his gaze traveling down the length of the car.

"She's a beauty, all right. I've been working on her for the past few weeks. Guy down in Scranton sold it to me. It'll take awhile longer yet but she'll be worth it when she's finished." Frank watched his son knowing he'd appreciate the work that was involved as well as the love and care that would go into restoring the car to her original glory.

Cameron stood up taking a step backward to admire it further. Vala, who had been watching from the sidelines, leaned sideways towards him, her voice dropping down a notch as she spoke, "What's so special about an automobile?"

Cameron gave her a stare. "It's a Ford Mustang," he stated as if that explained everything then turned his attention back to the car, taking in the details. "66 maybe a 65."

"64." Frank shared a look with his son that conveyed that they both knew the significance of this fact.

Still confused Vala looked between the two men, sensing that this piece of information was somehow important. "64?"

"It's the first year it was made," answered Cameron.

"Oh, so it's old!" The tone of Vala's voice changed to one of interest, her mind instantly formulating plans. "That means it valuable, right?"

Knowing full well what Vala was thinking, Cameron turned to her, crossing his arms, his face serious, his voice low as he spoke. "Don't even think about it."

"What?" asked Vala innocently, trying to pretend she didn't know what he was getting at.

Cameron stared at her in reply, not buying the innocent act for a minute.

Finally relenting, Vala gave him a self deprecating smile as she shrugged her shoulders. "Can't blame a girl for trying."

Uncrossing his arms Cameron returned her look with a half smile of his own. "Yeah, right," he said, his voice containing a mixture of humor and skepticism.

Turning back to the car Cameron watched as his Dad leaned his crutches against the side of the car and maneuvered himself into the driver's seat, turning the ignition on. The loud grumbling of the engine kicked into gear with an undercurrent of another sound within.

"Is it meant to make that noise?" Vala asked dubiously. Her knowledge of Earth mechanics was limited but even she knew that something didn't sound quite right.

Cameron glared at her in annoyance.

"Sorry," Vala said, though the expression on her face was less than contrite as she tried to hold back a smile. Bringing her hand up near her mouth she made a zipping motion across it. "Won't say another word."

***S***S* **

Leaning back in the deck chair Daniel closed his eyes enjoying the feel of the warm sun on his face. The book he had been reading lay forgotten in his lap as he basked in this simple pleasure. He had never been much of one for vacations. It wasn't that he _never_ took time off, it was just that with no family and few friends he had never really had much reason to do so. In the past whenever he had time off he generally spent it doing research, pouring through books, trawling his way through database's and websites. The idea of having several days off work, weeks even, seemed… unnatural somehow and was not something that he had done willingly and yet here he was having some time off with barely a glimpse of a computer or research material in sight.

At the sound of rustling paper he opened his eyes.

Having joined him in the sunshine, Vala was now stretched out on a large and colorful beach towel clad in a bikini. As bikini's went it was fairly modest, though to his eyes it still seemed to reveal an inordinate amount skin. Skin that was already beginning to turn to a nice shade of golden brown as she laid exposed to the sun. In her current position he had a clear view of her, laying as she was on her stomach, propped up on her elbows totally absorbed in some trashy romance novel she was reading, at least going by the glimpse of the cover that he had seen earlier, a pair of large black sunglasses perched high on the top of her head.

He wanted to deny, if only to himself, that he found her attractive but he knew that to do so would be a lie. His attraction for her though was part of the problem. The more he got to know her the more she confused him and confusion in his life was the last thing he needed. Still his eyes lingered on her for just a moment longer taking in the slim long legs, the pert behind which was covered in purple Lycra, the dip and curve of her back and the dangling ties of her bikini top that draped over it.

Pulling his thoughts away from Vala, he squashed the remnant of attraction back where it belonged. Even thinking of Vala in this way was so idiotic that it was almost laughable. Him and Vala? Never in a million, millions years would that ever happen. He lifted his book back up, gripping it tighter than he needed. As he did so the edges of a letter fell out from within its pages and all thoughts of Vala vanished as he picked the letter up.

Though he knew its contents by heart he found himself easing the paper out from its envelope and reading through it once again. Sarahs' offer had been a tempting one, even more so with this second letter that laid everything out in such a simple and direct manner. It was one of the things he had always admired about her, how she approached everything in life in a no-nonsense way. Everything to her was black and white, yes or no; there had never been any room for ambiguity. Once she had loved him and he had not and that had been the end of it. That the two of them had managed to salvage a friendship after everything that had happened in between said a lot for the affection and regard that they had for each other.

The offer was a tempting one and had come at a time in his life when he felt he needed a change and yet something held him back from making that final commitment. Ironically Sarah would have said that things hadn't changed much and Daniel would have agreed with her; commitment was something that he didn't take lightly.

"Reading anything interesting?"

Startled out of his thoughts Daniel glanced up at Vala who was now standing nearby, a glass of lemonade in each of her hands, her head titled a little to one side as she looked at him with curiosity.

With nimble fingers Daniel hastily folded the letter up and slid it back into its envelope. "Nothing important. Just a letter from an old friend."

"That's nice," said Vala leaning down to hand Daniel one of the glasses she was holding, giving him a provocative view of the swell of her breasts securely encased in the purple bikini top she was wearing as well as the the taut expanse of her already golden brown stomach.

As the glass passed from her hand to his, their fingers brushed lightly against each other, whether by accident or on purpose Daniel wasn't completely certain, though with Vala he was willing to bet it was on purpose. Ignoring the contact and the tantalizing view that was on display, knowing that she was just doing that flirty, sexual thing she did so well, he did his best to keep his eyes on the glass and took a long slow sip, enjoying the cool and refreshing sensation of the drink as it went down his throat. "Thanks, that's just what I needed."

Normally Vala would have come back with some witty and saucy retort but her heart wasn't in it and the touch of Daniel's fingers, brief though it had been, only reminded her of all that she had lost and what she was losing. Feeling an ache of pain flutter in her chest, she flashed him a small wistful smile before she turned around and headed back to her beach towel, trying not to the let the emotions that pulled at heart break through the control she was holding onto. Somehow with Daniel it was always so much harder to pretend but she knew that if she just held on a little longer they could move past this and everything would be alright.

Settling herself back down, with her back to him, Vala was unaware that Daniel had detected the hint of sadness behind her smile and was once more watching her, his brow furrowing slightly as his gaze became even more contemplative than before. "Vala, is everything alright?"

Vala twisted around, the paragraph that she had already read through twice forgotten as she smiled. "Of course. Why wouldn't it be?"

"Well there's been a lot of changes, what with Sam gone and Teal'c on leave. And Mitchell and I haven't been around much lately either. We've both been pretty busy, him with training new recruits, me doing research. And... things haven't been the best between us recently..." he said, pausing as he saw the slightly blank and confused expression on Vala's face. "What I trying to say, rather badly it would seem, is that just because there's been some changes doesn't mean that things between us have changed."

"Darling, I appreciate the sentiment but I never thought that things between us had changed. As far as I'm concerned we're friends and co-workers, aren't we?"

Daniel had a vague but unsettling doubt that she wasn't telling him the complete truth, which in itself wasn't anything new, but there was nothing concrete that he could pin point that said there was anything wrong. Yes they had been fighting more in recent months but perhaps that had been more his fault than hers. Deciding that perhaps he should just trust her this time and accept her answer as the truth he smiled back, the faint tinge of doubt fading under the weight of his own concerns about his own life. "Yes. Yes we are."

Relieved that Daniel hadn't decided to push things further like he usually did Vala gave him a another smile and a small emphatic nod. "Good."

As she turned back to her book, flipping over onto her back with her sunglasses pulled down over her eyes, Daniel had a thought. "How about we go out for dinner. The three of us, I mean," he said, quickly adding the last part in case she thought his invitation was something more than dinner between friends.

"Sorry guys, you're gonna have to count me out. I've got a date tonight with Amy," said Cameron, hearing the invitation just as he had arrived on the scene. Stretching himself out along the grass as he propped himself up on one elbow. "Why don't the two of you go instead?"

"I guess we could do that," said Daniel, cautiously.

Focusing on her book Vala gave a dismissive wave of her hand. "Yes, Yes. Now that we've got that all sorted can I get on with my book. I'm just getting to the good part, the one where the hero vampire takes the half naked woman he has rescued from a gang of werewolves back to his house and pulls her to close to his chest so that she looks deep into his azure eyes while her body quivers at his very touch..."

"Enough, please. I think we get the picture and thanks to you a very vivid and disturbing picture," said Daniel opening up his own book, casting Vala one more glance. "You do know that stuff will rot your brain."

Laying on his back with his arms crossed underneath his head as a slightly uncomfortable cushion, Cameron closed his eyes against the sun and gave a happy smile, pleased that the tension that had been around these past couple of months had eased off and that his idea for this break away was looking like it had been just what was need to put things right between the three of them.

***S***S* **


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Ten**

Daniel couldn't help but think that his evening out with Vala wasn't quite going how he'd imagined.

For one, the conversation between them wasn't exactly flowing. So far they had covered the weather, the decor of the restaurant and whether Vala should put some blue streaks in her hair. In between, during the somewhat drawn out lulls, she had spent most of the time picking at her food and downing two glasses of wine in fairly quick succession.

Putting his glass of water to one side he stared intently at her, his brow furrowing slightly. "Vala, what's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong," said Vala, flashing him a quick smile as she picked up her glass of wine and took a large mouthful. At his intense and pointed look, she quickly swallowed the wine and stared back at him, meeting his gaze with the same directness. "Nothing. Is. Wrong."

"Why don't I believe you?"

Vala glanced away, staring out at the other diners before she looked back at him, any trace of a smile now completely gone from her face. "What you believe is entirely your affair and I'm getting just a little sick of everyone asking me what is wrong."

For a moment Daniel thought he saw a glimmer of anger in her eyes but quickly dismissed it. "People ask because they care. Just like I care."

"And I believe that."

Though these last few words were spoken softly Daniel heard the sarcastic edge in their tone, confusion flickering across his features. "What's that..."

"Look why don't we forget all about it. As you said we're friends and colleagues and as... _friends_ and colleagues we're each entitled to our little secrets. After all you don't tell me everything. Do you?"

This time there was no mistaking the flare of anger in her eyes, though his confusion still remained. "Vala, you're not making..."

"I'm really not in the mood for this." The fight seemed to visibly drain from her as she placed the wine glass that she held in her hand back on the table, fiddling with it for a moment as she twisted it back and forth as if to set it just right, her voice going soft and quiet. "I'm tired and... " She paused, swallowing as her face paled. "I'm feeling... just a little unwell. If you excuse me..."

Not waiting for his reply Vala hurriedly got up and headed towards the ladies leaving Daniel to watch on in surprise.

What on Earth had just happened?

***S***S* **

Oh... that's not a good sign, Vala thought as she stared down at the small spots of blood that were scattered in with the remains of the food and wine that she had just brought up.

Feeling a little better now that she thrown up most of what she had eaten, Vala wiped her mouth with the back of her hand and flushed the toilet. Going into the main bathroom she tried not to look at the woman who was checking her make-up in the mirror that ran along the wall and went up to one of the sinks.

Muttering to herself she washed her hands and face. "Friends? Hmph! Friends don't lie. Friends don't keep secrets. Friends don't..."

"Bad date huh?" said the woman as Vala finished rinsing out her mouth.

Drying her hands on one of the hand towels draped next to the sink, Vala finally glanced over at her. "Date? Oh no... _this_ is not a date. I wouldn't date him if he was covered in gold. In fact gold has more warmth, more feeling than he has."

The woman smiled as she opened her purse and hunted through it. "Sounds like my ex. Believe me sharing a bed with him was like sleeping with a very large, very cold, very slimy snake."

"Oh Daniel's no snake. At least I'm fairly certain he's never had a snake in his head..."

The woman looked at Vala in confusion for a few seconds before she held out her hand.

Seeing the stick of gum in the woman's hand Vala reached out and took it. "Um... thanks."

"Well I hope your... non date gets better," said the woman, giving her appearance one last checking over in the mirror before she left.

Now all alone Vala stared into the mirror, gripping the edge of the counter with her hands as she leaned forward. Her still pale face stared back out at her, her eyes huge and sad, revealing the truth that she had been hiding from all these months. Reaching up she tiredly ran a hand through her hair and gave herself a smile.

It was small and tentative and completely false and did nothing to hide the sadness deep within her.

*******S***S* **

Pulling the rental car out of the restaurant's driveway the awkward silence that had been lingering around them continued on. Eventually Vala broke the silence, drawing on her inner strength to finally speak up.

"Daniel, I think it would be best if we both pretend that this night never happened. If Mitchell asks we'll just say that we had a nice time. He doesn't need to know anything else."

"You want me to lie to him?"

Vala heard the disbelief in his voice. Why she'd thought he would make this easy for her, she didn't know. "Not lie... exactly. The restaurant was nice and the food was lovely."

Of course the fact that she had thrown up most of it was something that neither he or Mitchell needed to know.

"_That's_ your version of not lying?"

Vala tried to think of a good comeback but she was struggling to hold on to what composure she had and Daniel, being Daniel, wasn't making any of this easier.

Slowing down the car Daniel pulled over to the side of the road and turned to her, his face filled with concerned. "Vala I know something's going on." Even before she had a chance to reply Daniel carried on, instantly reading the expression on her face that told him exactly what it was she had been going to say. "And yes, you've made it pretty clear that you don't want to talk to me about it. But I will not lie to Mitchell."

"Fine."

The word came out hard and sharp as Vala stared out of the window, refusing to look at him. Mitchell he had a problem with lying to but her... Well fine then. She'll let him have his honesty if it meant so much to him, though the idea that he couldn't be honest with her hurt even more than she thought possible. She blinked quickly, crossing her arms as she turned further away from him, staring out through the side window, tears pooling in her eyes.

At her stiff stance Daniel sighed. He had thought this holiday was going so well. He'd had his doubts at first. A holiday with Mitchell and Vala was the last thing he needed yet it was going better than he thought. Or at least it had been. Now though his doubts were back, louder than ever.

He really needed some time away. Away from the SGC. Away from the team and away from Vala. Maybe with some time apart they could salvage what friendship they still had.

Somehow though the thought of leaving didn't make him feel any better.

***S***S* **


End file.
